Guides
The Mourners Kaddish and Jewish Prayers for Mourning
Specific prayers are said at the funeral, at the burial, during mourning and on the yahrzeit. Here is what they mean and when they are said.
Reviewed by Joyce E. Torchinsky, funeral director.
The Mourner’s Kaddish in Brief
- The Kaddish is an Aramaic prayer that praises God; it does not mention death.
- It is traditionally said with a minyan, a group of ten adults.
- Mourners say it for eleven months for a parent and 30 days for a spouse, sibling, or child.
- It is said again each year on the yahrzeit and at Yizkor.
The Mourner’s Kaddish: Hebrew, Transliteration and English
The mourners Kaddish is recited standing, at synagogue services and at the grave. The congregation answers ‘Amen’ at set points. Our prayer book includes the full text, and you can download and print it for the funeral or the shiva house.
When the Kaddish Is Said
The Kaddish follows the rhythm of mourning.
1
At the Burial
Mourners say the burial Kaddish at the grave, usually led by the rabbi or officiant.
2
During Mourning
Traditionally at the three daily services, for eleven months for a parent and 30 days for others. Many synagogues welcome mourners to join a daily minyan for this purpose.
3
On the Yahrzeit
Each year on the Hebrew anniversary of the death. See our yahrzeit guide for how to find the date.
4
At Yizkor
On Yom Kippur, Shemini Atzeret, Passover, and Shavuot.
El Malei Rachamim
El Malei Rachamim, ‘God full of compassion’, is the memorial prayer for the soul of the person who died. It is chanted at the funeral with the person’s Hebrew name, and again at the grave, at an unveiling, or in synagogue around the yahrzeit.
Our prayer book includes El Malei Rachamim. For the yahrzeit itself, see our yahrzeit guide.
If You Cannot Attend a Minyan
If you cannot say Kaddish with a minyan, many people study a passage of Torah or Mishnah in memory of their loved one instead. Your rabbi can suggest what fits your family.
Reviewed by Joyce E. Torchinsky
Joyce E. Torchinsky is the owner and a funeral director of Torchinsky Hebrew Funeral Home, with more than 30 years in funeral service. She taught mortuary science and directed the Mortuary Science Program at CCBC Catonsville. She reviews our guides so that the prayers and customs are described accurately. Every family’s practice differs, so follow your rabbi’s guidance where it differs from ours. Joyce E.
Questions About the Mourner’s Kaddish and Jewish Prayers
The Mourner’s Kaddish is an Aramaic prayer praising God. Download our prayer book for the full text in Hebrew, with transliteration and English.
Traditionally the Mourner’s Kaddish is said with a minyan of ten adults. Some Reform congregations say it without one. If you cannot attend, study in memory of your loved one is a common alternative.
The traditional obligation is for a parent, spouse, sibling, or child, but Kaddish may be said for any loved one. Ask your rabbi how long your family’s custom suggests.
El Malei Rachamim is the Jewish memorial prayer for the soul of the deceased, chanted with their Hebrew name at the funeral, the grave and around the yahrzeit.
Related Guides
- Yahrzeit The candle and the date
- Shiva guide
- Hebrew calendar and yahrzeit dates
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